+from now on our troubles will be far away

Energetic interactions, those recyclable bags at grocery stores, soft and clean hair, empty rooms, baking, preparing, creating the right atmosphere, our 2nd Christmas, a cute and thoughtful theme, finally getting monster, puzzle time, owning silverware, carpets, history, constant guests, hopeful goodbyes, reflections over coffee, excitement for newness in others, apple chips in salads, being the hostess.

“Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.”

Hebrews 13:2

+just our hands clasped tight

Early caf ventures, dressing up for final exams, finishing strong, still breathing through it, target when it's about to close, running in cold weather, singing along to the radio, energy, less than a 4, an eight foot couch on loan, becoming an amateur botanist, thoughtful christmas presents, learning it's okay to feel need, quick naps, new recipes to bake, choosing to go in depth over out, feeling more at home than I ever have before.

+for the tiniest moment it's all not true

Birthdays, the end of the list, warm days in December, feeling put together, long lunches in a new home, leftovers, pineapple slices, procrastinating by cleaning, timing a dinner, housewarming gifts, feeling just the right age, step stools, the few, grateful, feeling loved and loving, laughing hard, community for lack of a better word, friendly new neighbors, seeing people off and how they smile and sigh in relief, saying goodbye with good hugs, being proud of my friends, the soccer lights outside my window, hearing girls giggling before they go to sleep.

+and in the end, the words don't matter

"I kept falling over.

I kept looking backward.

I went broke believing,

that the simple should be hard.

All that we are we are.

All that we are we are.

And every day is the start of something beautiful"

-Matt Nathanson

The smell of a big pot of coffee brewing, precious time spent over breakfast, pajamas and socks, magnets, step stools, the natural beauty, baking, delicate, doing my job, foggy windows, our own lives, friendship, weekend that tops all week, sun setting, christmas parties (all kinds and formats), beautiful paint colors, old friends in new settings, bubber, popcorn (always.), loving someone more fully, realizing the need and love for people, praying.

+the girl was new and the car was old

Writing Christmas cards, disciplined spending, morning light streaming into windows, brisk weather, loving mom, granola, constant gratitude, engaging, arranging, butterflies, my favorite people, feeling loved and cared for to the extreme, meals out, warm soup, smiles and hugs, sleepiness that turns into more thankfulness, listening too, plants, homey-ness, re-using lots of little things, keeping items that make me feel at home, washing my own dishes, the back corners of restaurants, realizing i trust more now, falling asleep to claymations, feeling warm and safe.

"What was it like for you? I can tell you in truth what it was like for me..." -The Avett Brothers

+but i don't need a telecope to see that theres hope and that makes me feel brave

Crazy situations that still end up working out, breakfasts, silence between answers, serving, signing my name over and over, a wonderful landlord, shampooed carpets, my favorite color freshly painted in the kitchen, sweet potatoes, timing timing timing, birds who live in the beams, cans, the dollar rack at michaels, wicker, homemade dinners, dwelling, toasting the new place, laying on the carpet to guitar music, reveling, fearlessness, lyrics.

+you've held my hand through the darkest night

Recovering it, strange wakings, white walls, classmates, mat kearney, good service, dust bunnies, a-year-and-a-half, percussion, layers of clothing, turning on the tv, being able to help, good choices, unexpected cookies/coffee, passionately thinking, sweet residents, soup, beautiful sunsets over belmont buildings, overcoming fears.

"...we'll still be singin' that song the one they can't take away...
and you are all that i've waited for all of my life."

+i guess i'll never know why sparrows love the snow

"We both made the call but it was only my fault,

Such a beautiful view with a long way to fall.

I was afraid to leave the safety of above,

but if it doesn't it's not love."

-Fiction Family

Standing up, wrestling with thoughts, strong gusts of wind, small and new coffee shops, feeling like I'm living in a novel, the real quality, simplicity, arriving early, pumpkin-chocolate anything, pancake day at kindall's, catchphrase, juniors, pots of coffee, care, warm leggings, staying calm, changing plans, over-my-head-help, music that carries you away.

+and everyday there comes a song with the dawn

More time than needed, long caf breakfasts, eye contact that equates to communication, vikki mckay, humility, respect, jobs well done, flashing colorful christmas lights, "lasts", getting a cap and gown for graduation, study tables, festive projects, smiles, warm hugs, proper bad-weather attire, falling asleep accidentally, the rain letting up, grace.

+i heard it in the song when you call out, but i got to say now its got to change

Dry feet, new light bulbs, sleeping later than expected, shadows, curling ribbon, carillon christmas carols, wearing heels from time to time, christmas decorations of all sorts, beautiful table arrangements, soft peppermint sticks, green beans, good causes, loving support, remembering the first two, being productive and festive, late night visits.

+what goes around now is coming back down today

A long breakfast alone, walking slowly, kisses, headbands, clean piles of clothes, losing a pound or two, keeping plans, picking right up where we left off, scared about the future but knowing we're all together, feeling grateful for nashville tennessee, getting asked the hardest questions i've been asked, being made dinner that is perfectly wonderful, butterflies in my stomach, advent, handmade scarves and hugs at church, holding hands with devon when we pray, holding my chin up, eye contact, the left side of the multimedia hall, hershey kisses mixed with baby candy canes, contentment and excitement, feeling ready, mod podge.

+and don't apologize for all the tears you've cried

"And don't apologize for all the tears you've cried. You've been way too strong now for all your life. I'm gonna get there soon, you're gonna be there too. Crying in your room, praying Lord come through. We're gonna get there soon. Oh, it's your light, oh, it's your way. Crying out now from so far away, you pull me closer to love, closer to love. Cause you are all that I've waited for all of my life." -Mat Kearney

Stopping in the beauty of nature, scale, humility, newness, rekindling, wisdom, insight, hats, frozen hands, being prayed for, tears that almost freeze in the outdoors, missing someone so much that you understand their important, being able to spend time with so many people, knowing that people are willing to spend their time with me, parks, dogs, exciting experiences that make me feel so very lucky, working through it, being completely honest even though it may make me expose the ugly parts of who I am, feeling like all I can do is give me life away.

+and when the smoke cleared it took her breath away

Sunshine telling me the time, smirking, scratching off items on to-do lists, red cheeks from the cold, hot choclate for breakfast, mittens, brick buildings, breaking the gap, endings, sweet goodbyes, sentiment, when people close their eyes they are so content as if they are trying hard to make the moment last, beautiful graphic design mostly with trees and branches, new wisdom and insight from an old friend, watching dance shows, feeling connected, the warmth of old friends' hugs, knowing I'll miss this, friendship pure and simple, experiencing it, figuring out why.

+time together is never quite enough

Breakfast, free, finishing a project, figuring more out, a walk to class, deep breaths, films, curly hair, small close groups, honesty, support, moving dates, visits, clean rooms, bundled up, clearing out, thick fabrics, the kind of sleep that three heavy blankets produces, deep committed love.

+have i still got you to cross my bridge in the storm

Blankets (all colors and patterns), rainy days with warm and well-prepared feet, the assortment of umbrellas that emerge, the civil wars, handling it, overwhelming peace that comes with prayer, gossiping only to God, coffee, remembering, surprise cancellations, overwhelming generosity, never understanding, choosing peace, socks, homemade dinners worth the wait, little white chocolates, being driven, rudolph, gatherings, the colorfully decorated tree outside the curb, christmas music, bells.

+it's so close but we're so far away

The way that coffee cups get so warm and welcome new days, welcoming the month of December, friends simply asking the questions, pursuit, certainty in small things, relief in the minutes, practicing deep breaths, productivity flowing, cold mornings that wake me up quickly, list making, preparing my heart, fringe, the man who let me into his lane on the interstate, being late but right on time, honesty, responsibility, creamy soup, the perfect reflection, deep admiration, throwing my cup away for me, learning to encourage through the grief, low aperture, re-writes.

+until my left was my right and up became down

Waking up well rested, cold rain appropriate for the season, wooden platforms, perfect breakfasts, real nervousness, situational eloquence, four hugs in a row, surprise run-ins, yummy lunches combined with catching up, feeling loved, silence and pauses, christmas wreaths on the belmont mansion, planning get-togethers, making the time, smiling, catching up under cozy blankets.

+don't let the bones the closet may hold get in the way

"You're okay, you're with me here in the silence.

With all of the violence crashing around

Saying we can't go, saying we don't know.

This road is narrow is the one we should follow.

We'll never be ready if we keep waiting

For the perfec time to come

Won't be steady, we'll never be ready."

- Mat Kearney

Waking to the sunrise and brewing coffee, noticeable change, reflections on water, cold air, camera in hand, apartment balconies, hearing old stories, finding a similar soul, feeling the absensce, asparagus, leftover turkey, glasses of water, reunion, phone calls, planning.

+we should all go, break down the walls being built around us

Sleeping in, cup after cup of home brewed coffee, soft carpeted floors, dancing in the basement, fresh fruit juice, learning the difference between cookware brands, owning measuring cups, turkey, old disney movies, sweet messages, easier, low-key, visits, care, cereal.

+haven't you noticed me drifting, oh let me tell you i am

Book titles, learning silence, no distractions, green grass, possibilities, excited about my turn, preparing for advent, the ability to drive to family, pets, devon's voice on the phone, singing at the top of my lungs in my car, regimented, the ability to write, the ability to find peace, connections.